http://twitter.com/#!/markknoller/status/274148246241284096

As we reported yesterday, Mitt Romney and President Obama had a date for a lunch summit today. Alas, the media was shut out and did not receive a coveted invite.

Interesting…Mitt Romney to have lunch with the president on Thursday. Closed press!

— Shushannah Walshe (@shushwalshe) November 28, 2012

Closed press! Oh noes, what are they to do? Unrequited love, it hurts. Looks like they will have to wait for Flickr photos, like the rest of us.

They are expected to. RT @ny4mitt: Romney having lunch with Obama. No press. Will WH post on their flicker stream?

— Reid Epstein (@reidepstein) November 29, 2012

They stake-out the lunch anyway.

Romney watch at the White House. instagr.am/p/Snxu3aEAO0/

— Ken Thomas (@AP_Ken_Thomas) November 29, 2012

The wait pays off, sort of!

Mitt Romney enters WH through ground floor of West Wing at 1229pm for 1230pm lunch with Pres Obama…. twitrpix.com/6stf

— Mark Knoller (@markknoller) November 29, 2012

Closest I got to a photo of Romney entering the White House. iPhones don’t have telephoto lenses. twitter.com/jeneps/status/…

— Jennifer Epstein (@jeneps) November 29, 2012

Bless.

I’ve checked the WH mult. No inadvertent audio feed of Obama/Romney lunch conversation. Rats.

— Mark Knoller (@markknoller) November 29, 2012

Heh. Keep tweeting, Mr. Knoller!

The lunch wallflowers whine.

If anyone wants to have a secret, off-the-record lunch like Obama & Romney today, I’ll probs be at Chipotle around noon.

— Chris Moody (@Chris_Moody) November 29, 2012

Maybe Carney will let them crash?

Carney briefing about to start while POTUS has lunch with Romney. Press corps will be pushing for details!!

— Kristen Welker (@kwelkernbc) November 29, 2012

. @presssec on media asking for access to Obama Romney lunch: “There’s some chance we’ll release a photograph. It’s a private lunch”

— David Nakamura (@DavidNakamura) November 29, 2012

As long as Jay Carney strings along the press about Obama / Romney lunch he won’t be taking any tough questions

— Charlie Spiering (@charliespiering) November 29, 2012

Written “readout” of Obama-Romney lunch expected later today. Carney says theywanted a private conversation and not “a press event.”

— PETER MAER (@petermaercbs) November 29, 2012

No such luck. Waah! Sorry, lapdogs, they just aren’t that into you.

ABC pitifully makes up its own lunch conversation. Hey, lapdogs can dream about being there, can’t they?

So ignorantly funny I actually laughed out loud.>RT @abcpolitics: Obama and Romney Eat Lunch: The Screenplay abcn.ws/TsZGUI

— Star Jones (@StarJonesEsq) November 29, 2012

ABC’s @mattnegrin imagines the Romney and Obama lunch. Lolz:abcn.ws/QPCswF

— Shushannah Walshe (@shushwalshe) November 29, 2012

funniest thing you’ll read this side of Dick Morris predictions RT @mattnegrin Obama & Romney Lunch: The Screenplay — abcn.ws/QPCswF

— Rick Klein (@rickklein) November 29, 2012

Aww, it’s just like you were there, huh, Rick? Now you have some more material for another junior high poem!

No worries; Twitter journos to the rescue! They will just pretend they are there. Fake lunch tweets begin.

“So governor,” President Obama says to kick off the meeting with Romney. “What about your gaffes?” #fakeWHlunch

— Matt Viser (@mviser) November 28, 2012

@mviser “Two girls?” Mitt replied. “Couldn’t put the stem on the apple, hmmm?” #fakeWHlunch

— David S. Bernstein (@dbernstein) November 29, 2012

Yuk, yuk, yuk.

Obama: “Sure you won’t reconsider?” Romney: “I appreciate it, but I’m not sure I’m cut out for ‘Secretary of Fun.’” #fakeWHlunch

— Olivier Knox (@OKnox) November 29, 2012

And the New Yorker’s Ben Greenman fake live-tweets the lunch.

For lunchtime laughs, follow @bengreenman fake live tweeting the Obama-Romney lunch.

— Peter Lattman (@peterlattman) November 29, 2012

I’m fake livetweeting the Obama-Romney lunch—Obama offered Romney a roll; Romney thought he meant a role in the Administration. Awkward

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Fake Obama-Romney lunch tweet #2: So far, mostly strained small talk about Powerball and Lindsay Lohan.

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Fake Obama-Romney lunch tweet #3: Obama: “You want to take a teacup as a souvenir?” Romney: “Really?” Obama: “No, not really.”

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

@patrickmjames Both praised Tommy Lee Jones and felt Joseph Gordon Levitt should have been given more to do.

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Fake Obama-Romney lunch tweet #4. Romney: “So, I didn’t see the news. Who won?” Obama: [silent]. Romney: “Uh, I mean Powerball.”

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Fake Obama-Romney lunch tweet #5. Obama: “Gingrich may join us later.” Romney: [silence]. Obama: “Ha! You should have seen your face.”

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Fake Obama-Romney lunch tweet #6. Romney: “This steak is so tough it reminds me of Ohio.”

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Fake Obama-Romney lunch tweet #7. Waiter: “Would anyone like more water? Juice? Another Electoral College drubbing?”

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Fake Obama-Romney lunch tweet #8: Obama: “So, what’s been going on with you?”

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Fake Obama-Romney lunch tweet #9. Romney: “Our internal polls suggested strongly that we’re having chicken today, so…oh…lasagna?”

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Fake Obama-Romney lunch tweet #10. Romney: “I’ll have the salad with the dressing Broadwell-style: you know, on the side.”

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Fake Obama-Romney lunch tweet #11. Waiter: “Is there anything else you’d like?” Romney, silent and forlorn, looks into middle distance

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Fake Obama-Romney lunch tweet #12: Romney: “Mind if I have another cookie?” Obama: “You mean another gift from the government? Sure.”

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Fake Obama-Romney lunch tweet #13. Bo Obama, bounding into room: “Roof, roof.” Romney: “Ha ha. Everyone’s a joker.”

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 29, 2012

Alas, it’s over.

RT @alinbcnews: Mitt Romney left the White House – got into his SUV at 1:41 pm

— McKay Coppins (@mckaycoppins) November 29, 2012

Maybe y’all will be invited to the lunch-prom next time, media!

Update: The sad state of affairs, summed up in one tweet.

the White House Press Corps is more interested in the stupid lunch btwn Obama and Romney then Benghazi. #discuss

— Grégé (@GPollowitz) November 29, 2012

Bingo.

Read more: http://twitchy.com/2012/11/29/media-shut-out-of-romney-obama-lunch-journos-console-themselves-with-fake-live-tweets/