Feud Update: So Gwyneth Paltrow and Martha Stewart have been betching each other out for the past couple of months. As of last count, Martha was winning with her phenomenal “Conscious Coupling” article. Gwyneth was not to be outdone, so she took time out of her busy schedule of making the world's most ridiculous holiday gift guide – what is the obsession with fucking backgammon? – to publish a recipe for “Jailbird Cake.”
That's a nice reference to Martha's time in jail for tax fraud, but also to the fact that her career has completely recovered. I want Gwyneth to present an actual challenge in this celebrity feud, but she's missing the point. Martha is painting Gwyneth as a talentless, wanna-be. Gwyneth is painting Martha as a catty, successful mogul-turned-inmate-turned-mogul. It's not that Gwyneth doesn't have the material, it's that she has a shitty strategy. A for effort, but D for execution. Will Martha even justify this with a response?