The next train to WTF Is Happening is leaving right now. Slightly NSFW.
1. There should be no snakes on the train.
2. Passengers’ clothes should not match the train.
3. No one should have to pose for a selfie because he was mistaken for Ed Sheeran.
4. No train should make this announcement.
5. If your train goes back to the future after hitting 88MPH, you should tell a member of staff or a police officer.
6. No train should ever – ever – have a pigeon on it.
Especially if it hasn’t got a valid railcard.
7. There can be no humping on the train.
8. “No sir, for the last time, you can’t take ponies on the trains.”
9. No train should leave with someone’s lunch and forget its owner.
10. Trains are not supposed to photobomb people.
11. Trains should never be this happy.
12. Trains, technically speaking, should not contain angels.
13. Breast inspection is always a good idea, but never on a train.
This image is graphic
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14. You should NOT perv at people on a train.
15. Trains should not transform into buses.
16. People should not chop onions on the train.